Monday, April 6, 2009

Way to mislead the masses, Crichton.


I just feel like I need to clear something up here. If you have read the Jurassic Park series or seen the movies, you have been lied to. This is not velociraptor! It's deinonychus! Velociraptor actually looked like an angry turkey! I can forgive Crichton for not including the feathers because a) it wasn't a scientific fact at that time and b) no one is going to be afraid of a giant Iago. Seriously velociraptor, you look ridiculous. 

But Spielberg's film and Crichton's book make the velociraptor bigger than it actually was, giving a lift of about 3 feet, just so it would be more intimidating. I get that, big things are scary...but then why not just make deinonychus the main antagonist? What's wrong with him? What, his name isn't good enough? You jerk. Who are you to decide that? You name-ist. You basically took deinonychus's look, put it in your book/film, and gave velociraptor all the credit for the awesomeness! It's not even proven that velociraptors hunt in packs! Deinonychus does though! I don't mean to say velociraptor isn't awesome, but honestly, call a pig a pig. Now, velociraptor has been enjoying all of this celebrity and exposure for nearly a decade while deinonychus silently sulks in his obscurity. Raptor Jesus didn't save you assholes. Raptor Jesus is just riding on deinonychus's scaly coattails! 

You lied to us Crichton. What am I going to find out next? Time travel isn't possible? Alien spheres can't give us mind powers? You let me down big time. RIP though.